He worked all day driving. Exhausted, he knew he needed a relaxing massage. He told his wife he would be home late from work. He saw my ad on FuckBookHookups or Doublelist, I can’t remember which, and he thought hooking up with me for a massage was exactly what he needed—a relaxing, sensual, erotic time with another man. He had been with a few men over the years beginning when he was a kid. He is divorced and had been seeking a LTR.
He told me he had seen my profile many times and decided to finally connect. I responded saying I would make him feel totally relaxed. That sounds good, he said. I said my place is very safe, private, clean and chill.
He came inside and immediately I felt his nerves. I saw it on his face. I’m calm.He needed to use the restroom and I showed him where. After driving all day he really needed to go. I showed him around he commented on how comfortable he felt. He was very good looking and we both saw attraction immediately.
We sat down and started talking, he said he had been curious about me and he was ready to experience the touch of a another man. His curiosity was overpowering. He said he was willing to allow himself the pleasure of feeling aroused by another man.
I’m all about encouraging you to be willing and open to explore. We had a really great conversations about a number of things, and that’s when he asked , “Does this make me gay ?”
I said that’s a great question. No. This does not make you gay. Men have been nurtured by other men for millennia. It’s the heavy hand of organized religion that made this ugly and wrong. It is neither. It is healthy for men to nurture each other. Men touching men can be very erotic and nurturing. Touch is powerful, it simply feels good. I really think all men should experience sensual touch from another man. Most of us were deprived of basic touch from our own fathers growing up.
So, again, does this make you bisexual ? Gay ? Only if you’re open and accepting of another man to love as a partner in life. If you’re open to building a relationship with a man that starts with trust, love, loyalty and friendship, if your aroused by him, if you like his mind, if you find yourself interested in exploring more with him like love and companionship then yes, you are bisexual. But if you’re only interested in men for sex, then NO, you just like men for sex—PERIOD.
There are a lot men who only enjoy sex with a man but can only see themselves married to a woman. Why ? I don’t know, it’s the million dollar question. My guess is fear of those closest to them judging them and seeing them differently. It takes courage and truth to be open and accepting to be a bisexual man or a gay man.